May 18, 2006

I'm a big fantasy sports guy. In the past year, I've played fantasy football, fantasy basketball, fantasy hockey, fantasy baseball, fantasy NASCAR, and fantasy soccer. It hasn't been a great year so far, with the exception of the steak dinner I got for winning hockey. The plus side of having crappy teams is that I am not as obsessed with checking box scores and making transactions as I used to be in the past.

I know that lots of people think fantasy sports is for losers and sport geeks. I think I discovered the world's biggest loser/sports geek while reading through one of ESPN's fantasy columns. Taken directly from Eric Karabell's column: (Karabell looks exactly like you think a fantasy sports nerd should look like)

• James (Linden, NJ): "Baseball dude, I'm here in Puerto Rico preparing to get married on Saturday and I hear that Eric Chavez will be activated this week. Since I'm out of commission Thursday-Monday, I need to figure out my roster for those days on Wednesday. I have Troy Glaus, Aramis Ramirez, Hank Blalock, David Ortiz and Carlos Delgado. Do I keep Chavez on the bench or play him over one of the others?"

I will say that Karabell does mention that James probably should have other things on his mind, then he just goes on and answers the guy's question!!

I hope I never get to be like that guy. What is he thinking, scheduling his wedding during fantasy baseball season? Just kidding. (For the record, he should bench Ramirez.) If I ever get to the point where I have to think about deciding whether to go to a fantasy draft or my wedding, please stab me in my eye until I bleed out whatever stupidity is in my head.

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