September 21, 2005

(With the new fall season, I'm going to open with another tv reference.)

FX is the cable home of the show Nip/Tuck. It's about plastic surgeons doing all kinds of stuff, including liposuction. Fx has this really cool show called It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia. One episode had a guy pretending he had cancer so girls would go out with him. I decided to combine these two shows in real life today.

A few weeks ago, I went to have a physical. I was in good health, but the doctor wanted me to get this little black speck on my lip checked out. I thought it was some dried blood from a cut that got healed over (or possibily some leftover bit from a Hersey bar). He thought it might be some kind of cancer. The doctor then referred me to his dermatology buddy, who I saw today.

So the dermatologist takes a look and decides they should cut out a piece and send it to the lab. But since this speck is only about 2mm by 3mm in size, I ask him why can't he just cut out the whole bit for the biopsy? He had the 'hey yeah, why didn't I think of that' look but agrees it can be done. I get a numbing shot and then he sliced off a piece of my lip. A lipo-section. (Ironically, it made my lip a little fatter.) Then he used some tool to burn the cut so it would stop bleeding, so I still have a black mark on my lip now.

They're supposed to call me back in 10 days or so if they find anything. If they don't call, then everything is fine. I told them I'm just not going to answer the phone. But now I can tell girls that I had cancer. (One doctor thinking it might have been a cancerous cell is good enough to qualify that statement for me.) We'll see if it works.

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