I've been inspired by Wilma to run. Bad idea.

0:00 (time elapsed) A bit of stretching, and I'm ready to go.

1:45 (that's one minute and fourty-five seconds, not one hour forty five minutes) I'm going at a good speed and feeling great.

2:30 My right lung collapses. Breathing is tougher, but I can stil manage.

4:40 Heart explodes. Quite painful, but I decided to suck it up and keep going.

6:00 I now realize there is little chance of me getting home before dark. But since I started at 9:50pm, there was little chance of that anyways.

8:10 Left lung collapses. Switching to anaerobic mode.

9:30 Smell the scent of marijuana smoke from a neighbor's house

9:32 I stop to enjoy the fresh air and medicinal powers of the 'fresh' air.

11:00 Fully recovered from injuries, resumes running.

13:00 End of run.

13 minutes to travel 1.4 miles (mileage according to mapquest). The days of track and cross country are long gone. I've decided I'm more of a sprinter now. I challenge anyone to a 20 meter race.